Feed me a bullet, send me to sleep

I had it with the crackheads, rude and offensive street people, and the old men asking for head in exchange for drugs. I want to come home. Why would my mom think sending me here would fix me? Its just as easy to get trashed her as it is in California. Matter of fact scratch that Its WAY easier. Every time I leave the condo Someone tries to hustle me and if I didnt have half a brain I would probably go for it. I mean I've had my fun here but like medication It needs to be taken in a little at a time. To Top it all off I have to deal with my closet case of a half brother yelling at me for every single little thing that goes wrong in the condo. People with there own mental problems shouldnt try to preach to others. Especially if their addicted to Gay porn. I am really not sure what to make of the time I have here. I applied for every job possible and I havent gotten any feedback from anyone who said they were hiring. Do I really lack that many skills? All I can do now to keep sane is write. 2 weeks and 4 days more of this hell on earth they call Atlanta Georgia. It took this trip to make me realize how simple of a person I really am. I really can care less about material possesions as long as Im with people that make me happy. My efforts to make friends are coming up short due to the fact I'm staying in the heart of the city, were its crackheads galore for about 6 blocks straight. Feed me a bullet and send me to sleep. I've had it with this. Being positive is losing its charm

Rotting away in Atlanta

It took the first few days of this trip to realize that I am not a big city person. I fall asleep to sirens and gunshots everynight and its not pleasant. I don't want to be here right now. I didnt sign up for this. Why I even agreed to it is beyond my reach even. You dont realize how much you appreciate home unless you've been in a different place for a while. I discarded everything before coming to this place and i would throw all of it away again just so I can have it back. Just for that brief moment in time when I sweared I was invincible. Now Im confined to city life. The only form of transportation is the Marta, a local train that goes around the downtown area I inhabit. The days go by way to fast for me to keep up and way to slow for me to enjoy. How I long for the boredom that we call Simi Valley. Its stuck up residents, boring atmosphere, and all of my friends and enemies. I don't know when I'll wake up from this dream and come to the realization that I'm actually stuck here for the next 4 weeks. Making the best of it has lost its charm. I just wanna go home.